i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
He did a backflip because drugs
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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