in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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