Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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