Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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