He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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