Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
