i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
