i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Dick very happy bro
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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