You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
