dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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