we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
