I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
