Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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