The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
