im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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