Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
