It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
