And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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