She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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