Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
