dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize
