i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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