Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
