this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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