You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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