Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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