I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
