After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
