I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
