Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
