these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
