try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
