She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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