Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
