my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
