she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
you win again, gameday.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
