Hey man sorry I got all grabby
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
