would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
