you guys were way drunker than both of me
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I touched a dick in church today
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
