Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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