if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
