the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
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