i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
