You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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