he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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