Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Even the bartender felt bad for me
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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