Even the bartender felt bad for me
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
