when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
