oh god the rape fog is back!
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
