I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Randomize
